The Home Stretch (Again!)

If you are my friend on The Facebook, by now you may have seen my new cover photo:

Did I change this in Powerpoint from a Kourtney & Kim ad? Yes, yes I did. And I'm damn proud of it.

Since my last update, I've continued to have The Plague. It's been not so great. I've been able to get some workouts in, but they are mucus-filled, wheezy workouts. Suffice it to say, I've been super cute.

I think -- though -- that it's ok. Would I like to be snot free? Sure. But my little condition has actually kept me properly tapering. I'm running slower than I would and less miles. Which is precisely what I should be doing. It's weird to say, but it's actually difficult to keep yourself tempered during this taper time. The schedule says an easy 4...but the training has made your body primed to run a fast 7. 

That's how you know you're ready I guess.

But the words of wisdom I have received and talked about in my last post are true. You really only have downside at this point in the process. No incremental workout is going to help...but one could hurt you.

So The Plague -- perhaps -- is my guardian angel.

This is a stuffed animal "Common Cold." He looks happy and like a decent guardian angel who is reminiscent of Lilo's pal Stitch. Sidebar true story: In college when I had mono a friend got me a yellow mononucleosis stuffed animal. Allegedly. But then we looked at the label and it turns out he got me a stuff Hepatitis A. The end.

But I digress.

In 8 days I get on a plane in 10 days I will be [allegedly] running a Marathon. 

Let the stalking of the 10-day forecast....COMMENCE!

People keep asking if I'm nervous and, no, I'm actually not that bad [yet]. I'm trying to stay positive and not freak out about all the could-bes and would-bes and should-bes. 

And I WILL NOT keep considering all the things that could still go wrong (although I have a fabulously messed up list in my mind) to continue my streak of training-for-but-not-running-marathons.

It must feel like the classic film Groundhog's Day to you, dear reader, as you listen to my "one week to go!" rant once again. Exactly 10 days away from the NYC Marathon that wasn't this year, I wrote this gem and it was an ignorantly blissful article about how the tapering was making me crazy.

Oh, you wanted to see crazy, MeriG? You had no freakin' clue what was to come. I'll show you crazy.

So, again, 10 days away, I'm trying to keep away the crazy as much as possible. I want to maintain the Excited (I'm going to my first Publix in just over a week, how could I not!). But I really want to keep the doubting, worried, and truly Scared part of me under control by trying to under-schedule, over-rest and to just be zen. What will be, will be. 

We don't want this on our hands:

Television genius

Instead I want to try to channel my inner Running Zach. Without the undertones of ignorance and racism.

In closing, as we enter my final week of marathon training & tapering [again], I leave you with this powerful quote from one of the great lyricists of our time. I hope you enjoy it and reflect upon it as I have:

Here I am in the place where I come let go 

Miami the base and the sunset low 

Everyday like a mardi gras everybody party all day 

No work all play okay 

So we sip a little something lay the rest the spill 

Me an [Betsy] at the bar running up a high bill

Don't Panic! Everything! Is! Under! Control!

Pictoral representation of earlier this week

Pre-Amble: Don't be scared. This post has a happy ending. Sorry for ruining it for you and not letting you get there yourself naturally, but I thought I'd just say that upfront because Run MeriG Run has had a lot of drama over the last 18 months. I'll let you know when the s**t really hits the fan, don't worry. This isn't it. Carry on.


My story begins where it left off after blogging on Sunday night:

I slept happily, blissfully, ignorantly that night and awoke Monday morning to some ankle pain. Just a lil' pain. No big deal.

I went to work at my big fancy job and -- while there being very busy and important -- started feeling a little sick. Flu-like sick. Whilest CNN reports that everyone and their mother has the flu. Egads.

The ankle went from bad to worse. I don't know if it was real pain, or if it was my mind playing REALLY MEAN tricks on me, but I felt like I could barely walk. My right achilles tendon (and to preemptively answer your question, that's the other ankle than from last time) was swollen. It actually creaked when I rotated the ankle. Sexy, huh? Creaky ankles?

I turned to the interwebs.

And then I got upset, promptly left work early and went to ice the foot and pray for a miracle.

That night I iced off and on, took some IB profin (to reduce swelling). I talked to Roomie Jen (who is running the Disney Marathon on Saturday! Holla'!) and emailed Team For Kids teammate Erica. Our [abridged and edited] correspondence was this:

Me:      AHHHHHHH ANKLE HELP ME WHAT DO I DO!?
Erica:   AHHHHHHHH I DON'T KNOW I DON'T KNOW MY IT BAND IS ACTING UP TOO AHHHHH AM I HELPING YOU
Me:      Yes! Xoxo.

I made sure to keep the ankle elevated all night even while I slept.

Archie, why you gotta be so creepy?

And I continued to pray.

Tuesday morning I woke up and miraculously....no pain. The cold? Full blown. But we can deal with that by buying CVS out of to-go tissues, zicam, Emergen-C and Tylenol Cold. This is the Common Cold we have on our hands, folks. As long as it's not the flu? We're good to go. And it's not.

The ankle, though....That could have kept me out for the long haul.

I did a short little test run Wednesday and so far so good. The cold is still knockin' me down, so lots of soup and TV and mouth-breathing for me right now and not as much running as I'd like. But that's okay. As many wise people have said to me, I've done -- at this point -- all I can do. Any incremental workout CAN NOT help. It, in fact, could only potentially hurt me.

Why did my ankle freak out on Monday? Who knows. Yes, I ran 20 miles on Sunday. And yes, perhaps this was just my body being like, "WHY DID YOU DO THAT!?!?!" but you'll have to trust me when I say that it hurt more than normal post-stupid-long-run pain. And that it has miraculously gone away. :::shrug::::

Why, yes! This IS a poorly rendered image of the Lord saying "you're welcome" to me. Glad you like it. Or have labeled me as blasphemous. One of the two.

Is it the ideal way to start the taper? No. But I'm hoping that my nostrils will clear enough for me to do some miles with the TFK girls this weekend.

Who nose!

(heehee)

I kid. As optimistic as I truly try to be, I also want to be real with you, faithful Run MeriG, Run reader.

Marathon running...is ridiculous. And kind of a bad idea. If I had to give a thesis for my blog at this point, that it is. If I ever change my header from the Barney Stinson quote, it will be to that.

New proposed header for Run, MeriG. Run.

You can train and train and train and train for months on end and a rogue "ankle" or "hurricane" can end it for you.

And the same goes now for Miami. We've lost some good men along the way. Miriam blogged today that she is out of the running and one of the other girls I've been training with was benched for several weeks due to the flu and doesn't know what she's going to do.

As Miriam so eloquently wrote, "

I think that by remembering the joy I find in running and the relaxation it brings is a healthier way to approach the hobby and the lifestyle that I enjoy"

So true. Ultimately I've learned that, and I've written about that before. The Marathon may be something you do, on a particular day, to push yourself. But really it's about the process that got you there and all the heartache and the good and the bad and the ugly that comes with it. You do what you can to stay healthy and to stay strong...but sometimes even that is out of your control.

Which is why I am not guaranteeing y'all a marathon until I'm at that starting line. Until the gun has gone off. And then I'll be like, "okay, cool, I'll run a marathon today."

And -- after all these trials and tribulations -- is it so much to expect that this is going to be the end result?:

Calming Down and Gearing Up

Okay, so I feel MUCH better after today's run. Back in NY, with some of my Team for Kids ladies, on familiar terrain, on an unseasonably warm [read: 40 degree] sunny day, I found some sort of redemption over the embarrassment that has been winter running for me the past couple of weeks. I ran 20 miles and it went okay.

I feel okay.

From here on out, again, it's taper time! Last time I tapered I went a lil' nuts. We'll see what these next three weeks hold in store.

So what does taper mean exactly? Well, I ran my longest run of the training season (ahem this most RECENT season) today. This week I'll do several runs and cross-training sessions, culminating in 12-13 miles this weekend. Next week I'll do even less and run about 6 miles on the weekend. And then the third week I'll run hardly at all and be all healthy and such leading up to the big race.

Gradually slowing down. Calming down. Gettin' DOWN with my bad self.

While meanwhile gearing up. Or so one would hope.

Right now, weirdly, I'm having trouble getting truly keyed up about the race. Maybe it's because I've -- you know -- thought I was racing before. Self-preservation might prevent me from having the same advance GUSTO, as it were, beforehand. Or maybe it's that I just have so many other things to be excited for that weekend.

I'll be in Miami with friend-extraordinaire Betsy. My wonderful team-mates and friends Erica, Merri and Joss are also running as will be the lovely Miriam. Also in Miami will be a myriad of people running the half-marathon, which is the first part of the course (including new blog friends!)

[Side-bar on the Half and Full being together: I'm a little worried about how mentally I'm going to be when at mile 13 a bunch of people are like, "wheeeee I'm DONE!!!!" and I'm like, "Cool guys, I'm just gonna, like, do that whole thing again..." Not cool, Miami course. Not cool.]

Betsy and I are staying on South Beach and it's gonna be awesome. We're arriving Friday evening, I'm running (allegedly) on Sunday, and we get to stay through Tuesday evening. Just being straight baller the whole time (if I can walk, of course).

So, clearly, I'm excited.

Which is why, when I SHOULD be preparing and thinking about some things....I'm actually thinking about others. Let me demonstrate.

What I SHOULD be thinking about:

Versus what I am ACTUALLY thinking about:

Should consider:

In fact am considering:

Should focus on:

Am very really focused on:

I'm pumped, y'all. Real pumped. I'm proud of my teammates and of me and of all the other people who -- despite the 2012 NYC Marathons debacle -- ran other races in November and December and/or trained for ones in 2013. That's something to be proud of, despite whatever tsunami or terrorist invasion causes 2013 Miami to not happen.

I know I shouldn't kid, but c'mon.

As my friend Meghan said to me tonight, "What would the world be if MeriG wasn't training for a marathon!?" Seriously. And is that the type of world you want to live in? Ask yourself that.

But in the meantime, I'm going to spend some dedicated time thinking about how baller it is that my race is -- once again -- in three weeks and that the worst -- once again -- is over.  And I'll spend some time thinking about how -- ironically -- I'm not upset that this all happened again. Because somehow I think it was meant to be, because otherwise I wouldn't have this fun vacation coming up! And everything, they say, happens for a reason. That's what they say.

And, of course, THIS:

Resolution Time

"I don't live in either my past or my future. I'm interested only in the present. If you can concentrate always on the present, you'll be a happy man. Life will be a party for you, a grand festival, because life is the moment we're living now."                                    - The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho

I love the message in that quote from The Alchemist, a book I fiiiiinally got around to reading when I was at home (after a very long stint on my "to read" list!)

And that quote, right there, is my New Year's resolution for 2013.

I've realized that so very many of my "issues" stem from living too much in the past or in the future.

Discontent with friends or family? Well that's living in the past. Things happened that weren't ideal or that plain ol' SUCKED. True. But, I need to stop griping about what was and focus on what is. I can't change yesterday, so what can I do to make today as positive as possible?

Money stress? That's living too far in the future. It's fantastic to plan and to be responsible, but it's very easy to get trapped in negativity of your own making by worrying too much about what is too come.

Should I have eaten cake and the entire large burrito from Blockheads this evening? PAST. And will I have to go to work tomorrow after what feels like weeks of being out of the office? FUTURE. Worthless to fixate on.

That burrito kind of is staying with me in the present though. So I guess that's a gray area.

Right now I am listening to the 10th Anniversary Les Mis soundtrack (seriously, check this out, this is a link to the full concert!). And I am blogging to you fine folks. And I am going to be asleep by 10 pm. And I am happy with all of these things. Right now. Real time. Burrito belly and all.

2013, to you I resolve to stop regretting the past and to stop worrying about the future. Today I live in the today.

And I resolve to do so with my running as well. Yeah, so I didn't run the NYC Marathon. [Cough, cough, twice.] Whatever! It's in the past, girl, move on!

And, yeah, I'm a little worried (to under-state slightly...) about Miami because of my last two weeks of horrid long runs. But that's the future, and I've done what I can do and what will be will be.

Today, I live in the today.

I'm going to focus as much as I can on -- for instance -- seeing my runs not as preparation for a race in the future but as a run I am enjoying now, in the moment. The goal can simply be to run for the day. To feel strong, good, healthy, accomplished in the now. 

Improving upon the past and striving for future goals is important and it's wonderful and it's grand. And I absolutely won't stop doing that. But it's the now that I really want -- and that I really will -- start to enjoy more. To be present.

So, what's YOUR 2013 Resolution? 

When the goin' get tough

I've been home in Plymouth for about a week now. And it has been delightful. While here I've spent a lot of good quality time with friends and family, gotten some great R&R, and enjoyed watching Archie try to make friends with my parents' 15-year old cat, Picasso.

Archie: Be my friend, Picasso! Love me!!!!!
Picasso: I will straight up murder you.

With my marathon a mere month away (again), training is at its peak. Again. I tried to get in a 14-15 miler this past Saturday at home and it went horribly awry.

Sometimes I look back at my blog posts and I'm like, wow, I am wayyyy too chipper. Because frankly? A good percentage of the time my runs do not go well. But somehow those runs become distant memory quickly and are not ones you want to share. It's the happy rainbow unicorn runs that you wan't to SHOUT FROM THE ROOFTOPS FOR ALL TO HEAR!!!! 

So with that in mind, I thought that I might share with you a more accurate representation of how a normal long run sometimes goes for MeriG. Lest you think that I am better than I am. Because we wouldn't want that.

Last Saturday morning I knew I had to get my run in early so that I'd have enough time to fully recover and nap in the afternoon before getting ready for a holiday party in the evening. My alarm was set for 6 am. It went off like a thousand daggers stabbing into my head.

Despite going to bed in a frozen tundra, my parents' house overnight had turned into hell's inferno and had dehydrated me to my core.

Archie meanwhile decided THIS would be the morning that he would become a cuddly kitty who wants to linger in bed and not bite my feet or lick my face or walk all over me until I got up. Nooooo THIS would be when he decided to be cute and sweet!

PURR! I love you new cuddle buddy!!!

So I had to throw my purring cat off of me and get out of bed into the fiery desert that was the Glansberg home.

I tread down the stairs and found my Dad making coffee. "I was thinking I'd make us a big egg breakfast!" he said.

"AHHHHHHHHH I really want eggs but I need to not eat a lot before I run and I need that not a lot to consist of the same thing I always eat which is the English Muffin and the peanut butter and my STUPID GUs THAT I DON'T WANT AT ALL TODAY and I want coffee but I can't drink coffee before I run and this SUCKS!" said I. Or something like that.

Dad slowly backed away. Smart man.

Outside it was a lovely 35 degrees consisting of a frigid mist. Not quite rain...but certainly not dry. Fan. Tastic.

I got bundled up and then realized... I left my headphones in New York. I brought basically my ENTIRE APARTMENT with me in a feat of epic over-packing, but left my headphones.

Mom: "Maybe you can just be with your thoughts?"
Me: "SHUT UP MOM I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

So off to Walmart I went. On Saturday, December 22nd. Because that was what was open before 8 am.

Me in Walmart before Christmas.

I bought the cheapest headphones they had (a decision I would immediately regret during my 2+ hour run) and finally made it to the starting point of my route. And from there things only got worse.

The weather was horrific. The aforementioned headphones were slicing my ears open from the insides and giving me little shocks as I ran (that's not supposed to happen...). My legs felt like lead and each mile seemed an eternity. While normally I run about 9:45 per mile for a long run, that day we were 10:30 or SLOWER. And it felt HARDER. Slower + Harder = Badder.

I was hungry even though I head eaten. GU was making me feel sick to my stomach (and I usually love me some GU!). I had to use the bathroom and -- because tourist season was over -- my usual go-to summer and fall bathrooms were closed.

So, after a bit over 10 miles -- which took me SIGNIFICANTLY longer than normal -- I threw in the towel and headed home. I re-hydrated there and recovered a bit and attempted to get a couple more miles in since I had intended on 14-15, but after a few minutes realized it was futile. A good long run was just not going to happen for me.

The cat, the eggs, the headphones, the weather, the tired legs....all a massive conspiracy against me to keep me from my run. And at first I was proud to have overcome these obstacles. Y'all can't stop me from being the best! I am winning!! Even though I felt like hell LITERALLY FOR MULTIPLE HOURS STRAIGHT! And that's when I realized....um...how is that winning? I COULD HAVE BEEN EATING EGGS!

Hey, girl

As a runner, it's important to admit that not every day is going to be your day. But it's the hardest thing to admit as well.

With these training schedules -- necessary for many people like myself to have structure and plans -- you do run the risk of believing that you have to do these runs. They're meant to be guideposts, but they can end up feeling like the law.

And then that begs the question: When it stops being fun -- even for a day -- what is the point where we throw in the towel and call it a day? If you're miserable, when does "practice make perfect" and "try and you will succeed" stop and "SIT YOUR ASS DOWN" begin?

There is a fine line as a marathon trainee between dedication and being an OCD freak. Fiiiiiine Line. And when you realized you've crossed it? You gots to get quickly back to the other side or you're gonna fall your butt down that slippery slope. Fast.

I have another, supposedly longer, run ahead of me this weekend. The schedule says 16-17 miles, but I keep trying to tell myself that I will just "do what I can."

Easier said than done.

Let's hope for better weather, for less friendly felines, and that my Dad won't tempt me with his breakfast siren song. And if all else fails, the following mantra works as well: Two weeks until taper. Two weeks until taper. Just two weeks until taper...

When do you say "enough is enough" on your runs or workouts?  Or...do you at all?